Archive for the ‘Humor’ Category

Too Comfortable

Wednesday, August 4th, 2010

I don’t know about you, but I like to get comfortable when I’m at home for the night. I was sitting on my bed talking with Josh when he asked if I would mind going to the store to get a movie from RedBox. I was still dressed, so I hopped up, grabbed my purse and headed for Walmart.

I had just started the dishwasher and needed more dishwasher detergent, so I was glad to go to the store by myself for a few minutes. As I parked the car and walked toward the entrance, I felt the blood leave my face as I realized I had forgotten to put my bra back on!!! Thankfully, I was wearing a camisole under my shirt, but I was still paranoid and embarrassed. I suppose I fit right in with the PeopleofWalmart.com!

As the boys and I drove thru Starbucks this morning, the boys noticed several bright butterflies on the bushes next to the drive thru. Owen’s favorite color is orange and one of the biggest ones we saw was orange. The picture isn’t great because I used my phone, but I thought I’d post it anyway.

I Will Survive

Tuesday, May 11th, 2010

Today is the day the boys have been excitedly waiting for for over a month; their trip to the dentist!

Who would’ve thought an awaiting dental appointment would cause my normally grumpy five year old to hop out of bed with a smile on his face? Sister Bear was almost in tears that she had to go to school and did not get to come with us to the dentist! lol.

Unfortunately, I did not arrange for a babysitter so I will be toting five children with me. This should be interesting. Thanks to my new phone, I can now take pictures without looking goofy with my camera around my neck at the dentist. I’ll update later and add the pictures.

Time to pack diapers, bottles, juice, snacks, books, etc., so we’re NOT the main spectacle in the office!

PRAY FOR ME!

~audrey

**UPDATE**

Here are some pics from our ONE HOUR/ABSOLUTE MIRACLE adventure at the dentist:





The dentist was a complete success. A few pieces of cheese and some hot wheels cars worked wonders on the babies as they zoomed all three boys through x-rays and cleaning in one hour. An absolute miracle!
Can I just add one more miracle that baffles my mind…..I can send myself a picture from my phone through a text message to my email account so I can then put the picture online. From the time I press “send” on my phone until my computer tells me I have a new email: THREE SECONDS!?!

Baffled.

Very cool. Technology is amazing.

You would think after three parrots children, I would have learned my lesson as far as what I say in front of them. Apparently I haven’t quite learned my lesson yet because as my sister-in-law got in the car a few hours after the dentist, she asked Joshua how the appointment went and whether or not he’d need a filling for a cavity that we already knew he had. His response was, “No, mommy said I have to get this hideous silver thing over my tooth until it falls out in FIVE YEARS!” (I guess he heard me complaining to my hubby! Oops again!) Yes, since the cavity is between two teeth, they cannot use a regular filling and instead will have to, as Joshua heard me say, cap it with a hideous silver cap until it falls out when he’s TWELVE! Don’t smile too big for the camera honey we don’t want them to see your bad tooth!
Lord, help me! haha!

Jesus Is Not Bipolar: Confessions of a Homeschool Mom

Friday, May 7th, 2010

Yes, Ali and Kelli, I USED IT! LOL!!

I attended a homeschooling “Moms’ Night Out” last night and it was MUCH NEEDED. Isn’t it amazing how a few hours with some like-minded company can lift your spirits, drag you out of the trenches, and give you that extra push you didn’t even know you needed? That is what last night did for me.

One of the last conversations we had was about us, as mothers (particularly homeschooling moms who are with all of their children, day in and day out), being Jesus to our children. Pretty scary, huh? Of course bantered back and forth at the sorry job we all feel we do at showing Jesus to our children through our day-to-day living, but Kelli really got us howling when she said,

“My poor children probably think Jesus is BIPOLAR!”

One minute we’re in the Word, using soft and kind words to encourage and direct our children, then suddenly someone sets you off, and as you fly off your rocker, you’re yelling and spanking and using all of those unkind words you spoke to them about just twenty minutes before.

Oops.

The fact is, we’re ALL sinners, saved by GRACE alone and our sanctification process will be ongoing until the day we die. The important thing is that, like Ali pointed out, we go to our children and acknowledge when we’ve acted out of our flesh, apologize, and reconcile with our children. What better way to show them Jesus and teach them about the mercy He has shown us, then by humbling ourselves unto our children and showing them that not only does mommy make plenty of mistakes, but that we’re humble and honest enough to admit when we’ve done wrong and ask their forgiveness.

What an incredible calling, to be a mother. I think motherhood is just one more way for the Father to show us just how desperately we need Him. How else can we do this job successfully? It’s hard enough being a mother on the days when we DO spend time in His word before the kids get up! I can only imagine how dispaired mothers must feel who do not know the Lord at all.

A few things I hope to write about and get your feedback on over the next several days are: what kind of creative correction works in your home, and what are some of your plans for the kids this summer. I’m not talking about big plans, but little ones, like craft ideas, daily routines, summer chores…those kinds of plans. I look forward to your feedback!

Happy Friday Ya’ll!

~audrey

Freaky Friday

Friday, April 30th, 2010

The two toddlers are screaming and bickering (I hated that word as a kid; my mom used it ALL the time…oh my word, I’m turning into my mother!! LOL).

Baby Bear spits up constantly.

I just switched back to cloth diapers so I could take “Diapers- $80” out of the monthly budget, just in time for Baby Bear to start teething, which just happens to make him POOP like crazy! **gross!**

I have a meeting in two hours and desperately need a shower, BUT I also have to run to the store because Baby Bear is officially out of formula.

This is not the Friday I was looking forward to.

I can’t help but remember that today marks “30 days” since we last heard anything about our girls and we were told we’d hear something one way or the other within 30 days. The chances of us hearing from DFCS on a Friday is slim to none…I’m banking on none.

Have you ever noticed that there are certain things that make you feel like your house is relatively clean? For me it is a clean/cleared off dining room table, empty kitchen sink (and preferably counters!), and a made bed. It’s definitely easier to clean when things are already “tidy”.

Oh geez, Owen is crying AGAIN so we better get out the door before the walls come crashing down…and it isn’t even 9am!

HAPPY FRIDAY!!

~audrey

Amazed

Thursday, April 29th, 2010

Last year (or maybe it was the year before that) my kids learned a song at VBS about letting your actions match your passions.

…I’m going to have to make this quick, I hear kids screaming and fighting…

From time to time, when we’ve had a really rough day, or my children are having a rough day with the “extra kids” in the house, I find myself asking God, “Did you really lead me to do this? Was this the right thing for us?” But on all of the other days, the really great days, I absolutely love my life and feel as though I should pinch myself to make sure it’s all real. I love being home with my children (and other people’s children! :). I know some women would rather get on the “crazy bus to nowhere” (LOL!) than think about home schooling, foster parenting, or staying home with their children indefinitely, but I love it.

I think one way we can tell if we’re doing what we’re suppose to be doing is whether or not it really feels like work.

A few weeks ago, Jesse (my five year old) was talking about what he wants to be when he grows up. Then he asked me what I want to be when I grow up. I told him that I’m quite happy being a mommy and a foster parent. Jesse said, “Mommy, those aren’t JOBS!” I just laughed and laughed. He’s so right. I never thought that I’d want to add more children to my house while I already have six, but I do! Even Josh finds himself telling me that we can have more of our own in addition to adopting if that’s what I’d like to do. I mean, what other “job” has a bigger impact on eternity than raising children to love the Lord and share it with others?

I’m certainly in no hurry to get to a dozen, and in no way do I want to compete with the Duggars, I just really enjoy my children and I like having babies. 🙂 (no, I am not pregnant)

To me, having the desire for more children WHILE taking care of my three and someone else’s three, is confirmation that I’m exactly where God wants me.

The hilarious thing about motherhood is, tomorrow I could be throwing in the towel and heading for the mental ward!

~audrey

Guess Who Joined the 21st Century?

Wednesday, April 21st, 2010

I did!!

Up until last night around 7:30pm, I had never sent a text before…in my LIFE! I now have a new phone and our new plan has texting!! I feel like a new person!

I hereby vow that I will NOT become one of these texting zombies I see all over the place. Entire families walk into the grocery store WHILE all four family members stare at their phones and walk while texting; it’s absolutely ridiculous.

My old phone was the one you get for free for adding a new line…four years ago! My new one looks like this:

I’m having fun with all the colors, sounds, and features; I’m sure my battery will be dead by lunch. LOL. On top of that, my kids should be content for days with our old phones as their new toys. 🙂 That’s my way of recycling my old phone!

Okay, on to something else.

Our ladies group, affectionately called Girlfriends at Grace, is beginning a new Bible study today on Joyce Meyer’s book Battlefield of the Mind. It’s only a five week study and I’m really looking forward to it. I’m determined to do all of my homework and make it to all five classes.

It’s only 7:45am and everyone is already up, fed, and dressed (except for me, of course).

Only 27 more days until Jesse ‘graduates’. I’m SO ready for the summer.

We should hear the definitive word on ‘our girls’ by the end of next week.

Well, I guess this proved to be a really random post. Oh well.

Have a wonderful Wednesday!!

~audrey

A Few Of My Favorite Things

Tuesday, April 20th, 2010

Do you remember when we were kids and there were certain things, items, or events that made us jump out of bed in the morning, excited for the day? I can think of a few examples:

Christmas morning
a field trip to the zoo
the first day of school
the last day of school
my birthday
the day I was going to get my driver’s license

These days, it doesn’t take any Earth-shattering events to get me excited and fill me with joy, but not a whole lot makes me jump out of bed in the morning. I like sleep. I love my bed. I have really great sheets (that I bought at Ross’ for $29!). I feel like I haven’t gotten regular, adequate sleep in about seven years; moms, you know what I’m talking about!

However, something hit me this morning, as I took the first sip of my coffee. I closed my eyes and said, “ooooohhhhhh, that’s good.” It was pure delight and satisfaction. I felt like I could’ve stayed in that chair for an hour and sipped my perfect cup of coffee. Then I realized, oh my goodness, this is probably how a smoker feels when he takes the first drag off of his first cigarette of the day. Gross, I know. But then I began thinking about other things that should make me feel like that cup of coffee made me feel. God’s word, spending time in prayer, and exercising should all give me that fulfilled, satisfied feeling. My pastor, who apparently got the quote from Tim Keller, has given a perfect example of what an idol is:

“An idol is anything more important to you than God, anything that absorbs your heart and imagination more than God, anything you seek to give you what only God can give.”

On a tough day, when I want to unwind, I can sit down on my bed with a basket of clean clothes and watch my favorite movie while I fold.

I love Little Women. I’m pretty sure it’s my favorite movie of all time. I have the book as well, but have never gotten around to reading it (maybe the 1000+ pages intimidated me!) I plan to read it this summer.

More than anything, I want to re-prioritize some things in my life. I want to crave getting into God’s word each morning, before I do anything else. I want to exercise, not so I can check it off my ‘list of things to do’, but because I crave how good it makes me feel.

To be perfectly honest, I don’t even know where to start. The thought of waking up any earlier than I already do makes me nauseous. But change usually isn’t comfortable, so I’m going to try hard. We’ll be re-joining the Family Y next month (for the summer) and I plan to start waking up early so I can go workout. I also commit to spending time in the word first thing each morning. As some added accountability, I will add something to each day’s post from my time with the Lord that morning.

Here are a few more of my favorite things; the little things in my life that give me great joy and pleasure:

*spending time with my girlfriends laughing and encouraging one another (even if we’re just grocery shopping together 🙂
*tending to my garden (I love going out to my garden a few times a day while allowing the Lord to speak to me about the power of ‘the seed’, the law of sowing and reaping, and the importance of preparing for harvest)
*sitting down to enjoy a special drink, whether it be Starbucks, Coke (I rarely drink soda, so when I do, it’s yummy!), or just a cup of coffee from my kitchen.
*cleaning my house, getting into bed after changing the sheets, waking up to a clean kitchen
*bubble baths, especially when I have time to shave my legs! 🙂
*watching my husband with our children. There is just nothing quite like a man who loves being a dad.
*hugs and kisses from my babies and seeing that look faces when they tell me they love me; like I can never do wrong in their eyes.
*reading. I love reading, but only when I get to do it uninterrupted for at least 10-15 minutes at a time.
*worship. oh how I love praise and worship.

I could go on and on, but I won’t bore you. This is just what was on my mind this morning as I sipped my coffee and listened to my five-year-old read from his school book at the breakfast table.

Have a Terrific Tuesday.
Time to do school with Joshua.

~audrey