Last week was a whirlwind of sick kids, drama, and a lack of sleep.

After Jesse fully recovered, Owen came down with the same 104 fever on Thursday.  He woke up with it and it never really broke all day.

I still don’t know how I did it, but I managed to spend most of the day in the bed with him.  Owen curled up in my bed after breakfast and I put a movie in for him.  I usually put the other two babies down for a nap between 10 and 10:30am.  On a really good day they can sleep for close to three hours.  Thursday was one of those days.  I only got up to move loads of laundry from the washer to the dryer and from the dryer to my bed.  Owen napped off and on all day long.  When he’d fall asleep, I would put clothes away or prepare lunch.

Joshua has music on Thursdays and a sweet friend was able to pick him up for music and drop him back off at home when it was over.  (**Thanks SO much Ali!!**)  That was another hour and a half that I had one less child to take care of.

At the end of the day, I still had a feverish two year old, but I had a smile on my face when Josh got home from work, because of God’s great grace.

Our pastor taught on the subject of grace yesterday.  Here are a few of his points:

*Grace means there is nothing I can do to make God love me more and nothing I can do to make Him love me less.

*It is by GRACE we are saved.  We have no grounds for an attitude of entitlement.  Nothing we do guarantees the blessings we want.

*Grace is God’s empowered presence, not His endless presents.

*Grace is available, abundant, and necessary for every believer everyday.

*It’s always too early to quit and never too late to start.

I’m grateful for God’s grace.

~audrey

Let’s see… how do I condense this story to fit into one post?

Sister and I were suppose to go to a relative’s house last night to get her hair done.  She had to get her current “hair do” taken out, given a perm/relaxer, and then her mom was suppose to braid it.  I was told this would take about two hours.

JUST taking the current “hair do” out took an hour and a half.  By then, it was almost time for me to pick up my boys from a church function, and her mom never showed up, so we decided to leave.  Sister’s “Grandma” felt bad about everything and decided to have us meet her at the Beauty Shop this (Saturday) morning so she could get her hair done completely.

We arrived at the Beauty Shop around 7:30am (Oh.My.Goodness.).  Josh called me around 8:30 to ask me how long I thought we’d be.  I asked Grandma and she laughed and said, “Oh, it’s going to be a while…like four hours or so.”

Once again:

Oh.

My.

Goodness.

I should have brought a book, my lesson plans, my household notebook, snacks, lunch….SOMETHING TO DO WHILE I SAT FOR HOURS!  Needless to say, I was the only white girl in the building and no one spoke to me unless they had a question about Sister.  I smiled a lot and tried hard to make sure I was presenting myself as approachable and friendly.

It just so happened that we watched “Good Hair” last night.  It is a 90 minute documentary done by Chris Rock on ‘black hair’ and the black hair industry.  I figured, we don’t know yet if our little girls are black, white, hispanic, asian… so I’d better be educating myself on all necessary subjects.  I learned a lot.  Seriously.

As I sat there, I looked through several magazines full of weaves, extensions, and wigs and I found that I recognized all of the lingo!  I probably smiled a few times as I turned each page and had flashbacks of last night’s documentary.  Did you know the black hair industry is a multi-BILLION dollar industry??

I noticed there was only ONE regular magazine.  The rest were all catalogs and hair books…then I discovered WHY.

These women come to talk.

Don’t get me wrong, I love talking with my stylist when I go to the shop, but it’s nothing like what these women were talking about.

The first thing that shocked me was when a woman began talking about her cousin who moved to Atlanta to marry a Jamaican man for $25,000 so he could become an American.  Apparently, there are “business arrangements” involving marrying men from other countries.  Her exact words were, “yeah, they just have to stay (live) together for about a year, then they can go do their own thing and in five years they can get divorced.  It’s just a business arrangement.”

Another woman asked if anyone had seen the “Smith boys” on the news.  Apparently they are well known in their community and had gotten busted for drinking and driving, with the better part of a liquor store in the back seat of their car.

One lady talked about her son just getting off of probation after two years, only to get caught making bomb threats at school and as a result, she was greeted by the police beating on the front door of her home.  They were all laughing hysterically as she was saying, “I was thinking, I HAVEN’T DONE ANYTHING!  WHAT IS GOING ON??”

I couldn’t help but laugh at a lot of their conversations.  White girl gossip is no better, it’s just usually about different subject matters.  Whose husband lost their job, who has recently gained weight, what friend is getting a divorce, who recently left the church, and whose child has been getting in trouble at school.

FIVE AND A HALF HOURS LATER, I felt insanely out of place, no matter how hard I tried to “fit in”. Sister’s hair looks adorable and is ‘good to go’ for at least two more weeks.  Maybe next time I’ll try harder at being a conversation starter…conversations that don’t involve illegal activities.

Live and learn.  🙂

~audrey

Boys are drawn to messes.  I opened the garage door this morning to let the boys play outside while the babies slept.  It has been raining off and on and there was a small puddle on the side of my driveway.  On the other hand, there was PLENTY of dry space to ride bikes and scooters.  However, like a moth to a flame, Owen headed straight for the puddle with his Big Wheel.  White shirt, good shoes, right through the muddy puddle.  It’s times like that, that really do make me thank God for boys.  I love that my little boys could be happy for hours with a stick, some dirt, and a tree to climb.  I love that my boys can roll around in a muddy puddle after (or during) a good rain and call it The Best Day Ever!  My boys fall off their bikes and get right back up.  Sister, on the other hand, scratches her finger and I have to spend the next thirty minutes calming her down.  Hopefully ‘our little girls’ are still young enough to toughen up a little, although I’m sure that will come somewhat naturally with three big brothers.  I still can hardly believe it.  We’re really going to have two daughters!  The boys are now praying for their baby sisters again.  Owen will practically have a twin sister!

I look forward to painting little finger nails, letting them play dress up with Mommy’s clothes and put on Mommy’s make-up.  I look forward to girls’ weekends with my mom and my girls, shopping in Greenville.  I look forward to teaching them how to cook and watching their eyes light up when Daddy gets home from work.  Surely, they will be Daddy’s girls.  We will be complete.

On the other hand, Joshua said this morning,

“Mommy, wouldn’t it be cool if God would just put a new baby in your belly at the beginning of every year!”

No, Joshua, I’m sorry.  That would not be cool.

~audrey

First of all, I should say THANK YOU.  Thank you for being faithful to pray every time I ask.  How do I know that you pray, you may ask?  Because prayer works.  And when you pray, things happen.  Jesse is much better.  He has only had one fever today and he’s been able to keep down his last three meals.  Owen now has a fever, but it’s not high like Jesse’s.  There are some pretty nasty viruses going around and we’ve been told that is very likely what they’re passing around.

Now for the GREAT news.  Remember the baby girls we were praying for a few months ago?  The little girls from out of town who were going to be ‘foster-to-adopt’??  Well we received news today that THEY ARE COMING!!!!  We’re still unsure of when.  We were told it may be a slow process because they’re moving out of county; possibly several months.  But wow.  I can hardly believe it!  The crazy thing is, I was just telling a friend, the other day, about our decision to let our current foster children stay with us if things didn’t work out with their family taking them and my friend asked, “What about the girls you were suppose to adopt?”  I said, “Well, I’ve all but given up on that situation, since we haven’t heard anything in so long.  If everything were to work out with the girls, it would be a tremendous surprise, but until then, six kids will definitely keep my mind off of it!”  The funny thing is, no one has asked me about “the girls” in several weeks, but all of a sudden several people have asked me about them in the last week or so.  Now I’ll have great news!

We still don’t know anything about them.  Names, exact ages (they were 4 months old and 2 years old when we got the first call a few months ago but that may not have been completely accurate), or nationality.  I suppose it’s kind of like not finding out what you’re having when you’re pregnant…times TEN!  Now I really can start picking out baby girl names!!  Oh my goodness, I can start planning how I want to decorate their room, I can shop clearance sales for next years’ winter wardrobe, shoes, hair bows….you just don’t understand!  SEVEN YEARS OF BOYS and suddenly I will get to buy GIRL STUFF!?!  FUNNNNN!!!

The down side is, when the girls do finally arrive, our current foster children, who we’ve completely fallen in love with, will have to move to another foster home if they haven’t already been reunited with their family.  But God’s timing is perfect so I’ll continue to trust in His ways.

Uh-oh, Owen just peed on the floor in the bathroom and I hear my husband saying, “YOU WERE IN THE BATHROOM!  THE POTTY IS RIGHT THERE?!?”

Time to intervene.

Good night.   🙂

~audrey

Today was another gorgeous “taste of spring” day. Sunny and 72. Absolutely beautiful. Unfortunately, I spent my day in the Children’s Hospital with Jesse. It all started Sunday night after his baptism. The water had been freezing, he had gotten really cold and by the time we got home, he didn’t feel well. Monday morning he was complaining of not feeling well and he had a cough, so we kept him home from school. By Monday afternoon, Jesse was running a 104 fever and by bedtime he was vomiting. He threw up throughout the night as he would try to sip on water or take medicine for his fever. When Jesse gets fevers, they are always high and he gets terrible headaches with them.
This morning, he looked like he’d been hit by a truck, so I took him to the doctor. The doctor tested him for strep and the flu; both came back negative. His urinalysis “lit up like a Christmas tree”, according to the doctor, and his tummy was very tender to touch, so the doctors decided to send him to the children’s hospital for IV fluids and further testing.
When we arrived, my phone died. Lovely. All day at the hospital and no way for Josh (or ANYONE) to contact me. Jesse’s fever was still around 104 when they admitted him. His heart rate was in the 150’s and his blood pressure at one point was 85/24! He slept off and on for the first few hours. They had him hooked up to a monitor, with leads on his chest, an O2 sat. on his thumb, and an IV in his hand. When his fever finally broke, he sweat so profusely that the leads on his chest fell off. They had to clean him up and put new ones on. He perked up for a bit after his fever broke. His heart rate went down slightly and they talked of discharging him around 1:30.  Unfortunately, by 2:00pm, his fever was back with a vengeance, heart rate was back up, and his blood pressure had plummeted.  We were there for another two hours as they pumped him full of fluids, monitored his stats, and waited for him to stabilize.

Now it is 8:00pm.  Jesse fell asleep on the couch when we got home, but he woke up with a 103 fever and terrible headache.  When Josh gave him tylenol, he threw it up five minutes later…along with the little bit of lunch he was able to eat.  Thirty minutes after throwing up the tylenol, we got permission from the doctor to let him SIP a dose of motrin.  So far, so good.  It has stayed down and his fever is down to 101.  I’m praying we make it through the night without having to return to the ER.

Jesse’s blood work at the hospital revealed that his immune deficiencies from two years ago have gotten slightly worse; the labs show one more deficiency than his past labs.  They’re referring us back to an immunologist who can follow Jesse more closely and run further tests.

Jesse was healthy all last year when we home schooled.   Since he’s been back in school this year, he’s had this high fever with vomiting, five or six times since October.  I was really hoping that year off was what he needed to strengthen his immune system and get well.  I guess I was wrong and now we’re back at square one.  I do feel even better now about our firm decision to home school all of the boys in the fall.  This was definitely confirmation that Jesse’s body needs it more now than ever.

Please pray for wisdom as we go back to specialists and procedures and blood work for answers.  I trust that God will send us where we need to go.  I have peace; after all, we did this for a full year and a half, just under two years ago.  We’ll get through it again.  Hopefully with more concise results this time…and treatment!  Until then, we’ll continue to pray, trust the Lord, and double up on Jesse’s Juice Plus+.

~audrey

I had visitation last night with the foster children and their parents. As a result, I started dinner, but asked Josh to please finish it for me. I had boiled several chicken breasts to make chicken and dumplings and I left instructions on how to finish it. When I got home, I ate the BEST chicken and dumplings I’d ever put in my mouth. No lie, Josh had perfected the broth to the perfect thickness and flavor and the dumplings were out of this world. He was quite proud and I was quite excited that I will probably never cook chicken and dumplings again; Josh will gladly do it with pride. 🙂

On another note, while we were at visitation, which takes place at McDonald’s, I noticed the baby had a handful of cheetoz!! I’m suppose to be ‘hands off’ at visitation. My purpose is to observe and report and only intervene if absolutely necessary. So who am I to snatch the cheetoz out of the six month old’s hand. The six month old who will hardly even eat baby food for me. The six month old that doesn’t even have ONE SINGLE TOOTH?? Surely someone saw my jaw hit the floor, but I exercised self-restraint and stayed in my seat. No wonder he doesn’t eat my baby food! His first food was cheetoz and bits of hot dog!! I understand that every mother is different. There are cultural differences, family differences, differences in parenting techniques based on the parent’s age, etc. I’ve always been rather particular about what goes into the mouths of my babies. Oh well, surely it’s no worse than my grandmother (God rest her soul) sneaking Jesse little pieces of pineapple cake at Christmas…when he was FIVE MONTHS OLD and I was strictly breastfeeding. I can laugh about those things now. 🙂

The kids are all doing great. We’re enjoying a beautiful Saturday outside in this gorgeous weather. My boys are going to spend the night with Mimi and Papa tonight, so we’re looking forward to a “quieter” evening with our other three.

Here is a sneak peek of Jesse’s kindergarten cap and gown pics. He is now completely obsessed with wearing a tie and asks me daily when I’m going to buy him some of his own. The one he’s wearing in the picture is borrowed from a friend.

Also, a pic of the Joshua at his recorder recital.

~audrey

Last week, our foster childrens’ case went back to court. They were suppose to go into a relative’s custody after the hearing…if everything went exactly as planned; like THAT ever happens!

Josh and I had a talk the night before the hearing and decided, after much discussion and prayer, that we would agree to keep the children in our home if things didn’t go according to plan in court. We had originally taken these children in as an “emergency placement” and we told our agency they would have to find another foster home for them if they needed to be in care for longer than a month. Six children under the age of seven was just too much for us and we had been pretty clear on that. However, after just two short weeks, we had really grown to love these children and see in each one of them, how much they need a stable, loving environment right now. With that, we made our decision.

Here we are, a week later, and we still have six children. It’s funny how you can see in hindsight, how God has prepared you for certain tasks. I can honestly say that we do have peace about our decision, and although there is a screaming baby in the other room, and I’m going to have to load up four kids into the car, in the pouring rain in about ten minutes to go get Jesse from school, we’re making it all work. Somehow, making the decision to keep them in our home has changed the way I love them. I’m feeling more like their temporary Momma now, rather than just their foster parent. Unless you’ve been a foster parent, there is really no way to describe how uncomfortable those first few weeks are. You have new children in your home, making things a little crazy. You can’t discipline them the way you’d like. They don’t necessarily treat your children the way you’d like them to be treated. They don’t talk like you or eat the food you prepare. They don’t sleep through the night like your own children have for at least the last two years. You can’t get a babysitter for them when you want a few hours away, because all your babysitters must be approved through the agency after much investigation. It’s just different; in an indescribable way. But, I’d say after the first two weeks, it’s easier to tell whether or not the children are a good fit in your home. Our first placement, which was also three children, including a ten year old boy, was NOT a good fit. These kids, however, I can see staying with us for as long as they need.
It’s funny how this crazy control freak that needs to have everything planned out is suddenly flying by the seat of her pants, running on a measly few hours of sleep per night, and learning to enjoy it!
God surely has a sense of humor.

~audrey

Sometimes I look at my children and still can’t believe they’re mine. The last eight years of my life have gone by so very fast. Josh and I recently celebrated our eighth anniversary and we were able to tell Joshua that he was our first anniversary present. We got pregnant with him three months after we got married and came home from the hospital with him on our first anniversary. What a miraculous gift. I can honestly tell you I have never once regretted getting pregnant so quickly into our marriage. We trusted God from day one and knew that He’d bless us with children in His timing.

Joshua Nicholas was born on February 20, 2003 at 5:38pm. I was induced that morning at 7am and after ten hours of labor, including two and a half hours of pushing, Joshua arrived with the cord around his neck twice, completely blue, and not breathing. Being as young as I was and being my first child, I didn’t know to be scared, so I wasn’t. I’d seen so many episodes of The Baby Story on TLC, I was kind of wondering where the music was?? I vaguely remember my mother-in-law holding oxygen to his nose as the nurses ‘bagged him’ and pumped air into his lungs. Eventually, he let out a wimpy cry and by the time they did his second set of APGAR scores, he was close to perfect. Aside from never being able to latch on, Joshua was the perfect baby.

He began sleeping through the night at seven weeks. He was always smiling and had the most beautiful blue eyes and long eye lashes. No matter what I dressed him in, people thought he was a girl, at least once a day. It was really quite ridiculous.

Joshua took his first steps two weeks before his first birthday. He’s the only one of my boys that walked before they turned one. Jesse and Owen weren’t until months after their first birthday!

Joshua was a small baby. At his well-child check-ups he was always off the bottom of the charts…5th and 7th percentiles for weight and height. However, he was always healthy, so the doctor never showed concern. He only weighed 18lbs. on his first birthday. But now, at seven years old, he’s a normal seven year old boy. He weighs about 55lbs. and is over 4ft. tall. I often have to remind myself how old and mature he is. I’m finding myself talking to him a little differently. He understands so much and handles things like a typical first-born. Joshua is definitely a leader. He enjoys helping around the house, doing chores, “managing his money” (haha, he’s saving up for a car and is quite aware that he only has nine years left to save!), doing manly stuff with Daddy, Grandpa, and Papa, and he loves to learn.

It’s hard to believe he’s finishing up first grade! This is our second year homeschooling and we’re still loving it. Joshua always asks to do math first. Some days he’ll do four or five lessons in one sitting. Reading, on the other hand, has taken some extra practice and perseverance, but now that he has the hang of it he’s enjoying reading all of our Dr.Suess books to his brothers…although, at the rate Jesse is learning to read, they’ll be taking turns reading to Owen by the summer.

He loves using his imagination and going on wild adventures in the back yard. He takes a music theory class on Thursdays and is learning to read music and play the recorder. His first recital was last Thursday and they did an excellent job. I’m so very proud of him.

His newest interest is LEGOS. He got quite a few LEGO sets for his birthday, and the very next week, he and his brothers were invited to attend a LEGO club at a local church. Josh took all three boys and they had a blast. That will definitely be something they do together on a monthly basis.

It is a joy and honor to be raising this Godly young man who will be a vital part in the kingdom of God. Joshua and Jesse will be getting baptized on Sunday. I am still amazed at my boys’ yearning to ask Jesus into their hearts. Joshua did it at VBS last summer and I had the privilege of praying with him.  Jesse actually stopped me in the middle of our bed time prayers several months ago and said, “Mommy (with frustration), when are you going to help me ask Jesus into my heart??”  We prayed right then and he simply smiled, as if he’d just been waiting for the right moment.   The best part is, Josh will be baptizing them both.  I hope I can hold it together long enough to take some pictures and video.

Okay, this post ended up a lot longer than I had planned, but here are some pics from his birthday:

Here is Joshua eating his traditional birthday cinnamon roll with a candle on it.

Owen was probably crying because he realized this day wasn’t going to revolve around him! Poor kid.

Jesse is holding Joshua’s new Bible that we got him for his birthday. Jesse was so proud to wrap it for him.

It was so fun to watch him open all of his presents as he read some of the cards himself and was so gracious to his friends and family. Not to mention the excitement over getting so many great new things.

I love the look on his face in this picture. He was so excited and wrapped up in the moment.

Joshua, we are so very proud to be your parents and we pray that God would continue to give us wisdom to raise you to your fullest potential and destiny.  May you always seek the Lord in all that you do.  I pray you’d have eyes to see what God is doing here on Earth, ears to hear the voice of the Holy Spirit, and boldness to carry His light everywhere that you go.  We love you Joshua!

love,

Mommy and Daddy.

~audrey

Sorry, I had to do that disclaimer because my sweet brother is a faithful reader and I’d hate for him to unknowingly begin reading about his big sister’s sex life on a Monday morning. LOL! 🙂

So anyways, there is a local church that does a “Sex Talk Series” in February. I think this was the second year they did it. Here is the link to the podcasts if you’d like to check any of them out. I haven’t actually listened to any of them yet, but I plan to listen to the one entitled The Battle In the Bed. My friend told me about some of the stories Pastor Brent told and it melted my heart. Like the couple who put a dollar in a box by their bed every time they made love, and by their 40th or 50th anniversary, they had enough cash to go to Hawaii! Daddy would come home from work and say, “I’ve got a dollar in my pocket.” and Momma would say, “I know just where to spend it.” I think that’s awesome.

How about the man who went through many hardships in his life, including losing his job at one point. For most men, losing their job and ability to provide for their family, even if for a brief time, is a huge shot to their self-esteem. It is in their heavenly make-up to have the drive to provide for their family and when they lose that ability for one reason or another, it has the potential to scar, and even ruin a man. However, this man had one crucial constant in his life. His wife was faithful in the bedroom. He knew that no matter how life was going, his wife would be there to fulfill that one particular need for him almost every night. I don’t know if Pastor Brent gave an actual number of how many times a week, but clearly, it was consistent…more than my poor husband can say at the moment. For those of you/us that have read Created to Be His Helpmeet, you know how vitally important it is, not only to our marriage, but also to our husbands individually, that we are meeting his needs in a physical way. I’m going to try to listen to this podcast today…and maybe tomorrow and the next day, because I’m committing to consistency in my bedroom this month…and hopefully every month after that as well. I suppose I ought to commit to caution as well or we might have some pregnant bloggers after a month or so!! LOL!! 🙂

Happy Monday!

~audrey